What is the 90/10 Kissing Rule?
The 90/10 kissing rule is a concept popularized by the movie "Hitch," where one person initiates 90% of the movement toward a kiss, while the other completes the remaining 10%. This rule is designed to create a balance between making a move and allowing the other person to reciprocate, ensuring mutual interest and consent.
How Does the 90/10 Kissing Rule Work?
The 90/10 rule is about creating a comfortable and consensual environment for kissing. By moving in 90% of the way, you signal your interest clearly, while leaving the final 10% to the other person allows them to show their willingness and enthusiasm. This approach helps avoid awkward situations and ensures both parties are on the same page.
Steps to Implement the 90/10 Kissing Rule
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Gauge Interest: Look for signs of interest, such as prolonged eye contact, smiling, or leaning in closer. These cues indicate that the other person might be open to a kiss.
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Move Slowly: Begin closing the gap between you and the other person at a gradual pace. This gives them time to process your intentions and react accordingly.
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Pause: As you approach the 90% mark, pause slightly to give the other person the opportunity to lean in and complete the kiss.
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Observe Response: If the other person leans in or closes the gap, it’s a sign they are interested. If they pull back or show hesitation, respect their boundaries.
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Respect Boundaries: Always be mindful and respectful of the other person’s comfort level. Consent is crucial in any romantic interaction.
Why Is the 90/10 Kissing Rule Important?
The 90/10 rule is important because it emphasizes consent and mutual interest. In the context of dating and relationships, ensuring both parties are comfortable and willing is essential. This rule helps prevent misunderstandings and fosters a respectful and enjoyable experience.
Benefits of the 90/10 Kissing Rule
- Encourages Consent: By allowing the other person to make the final move, it ensures that both parties are comfortable and willing.
- Reduces Pressure: The initiator doesn’t have to worry about being too forward, while the other person has the freedom to reciprocate or decline.
- Builds Anticipation: The gradual approach creates a sense of excitement and anticipation, enhancing the overall experience.
Practical Examples of the 90/10 Kissing Rule
Consider a scenario where you’re on a date and feel a strong connection. You notice your date is maintaining eye contact and smiling. You decide to lean in slowly, stopping just before your lips meet. Your date then leans in to complete the kiss, confirming mutual interest.
In another situation, you might lean in 90% of the way, but your date pulls back slightly. This is a clear signal to pause and reassess, ensuring you both feel comfortable with the progression of your interaction.
People Also Ask
What If the Other Person Doesn’t Lean In?
If the other person doesn’t lean in, it’s important to respect their boundaries. They might not be ready or interested in kissing at that moment. Acknowledge their response and continue the conversation naturally.
Can the 90/10 Rule Apply to Other Romantic Gestures?
Yes, the 90/10 rule can be applied to other romantic gestures, such as holding hands or hugging. It’s about initiating an action while leaving room for the other person to reciprocate, ensuring mutual comfort and consent.
Is the 90/10 Rule Suitable for All Relationships?
The 90/10 rule is a guideline rather than a strict rule. It works well in early stages of dating when you’re still gauging mutual interest. In established relationships, partners might have different comfort levels and communication styles.
How Can I Tell If Someone Wants to Kiss Me?
Look for non-verbal cues such as prolonged eye contact, smiling, leaning in, or touching your arm. These signs often indicate interest and readiness for a kiss.
What If I’m Nervous About Making the First Move?
Feeling nervous is natural. The 90/10 rule allows you to express interest while providing a safety net. Start by leaning in slightly and observing the other person’s response.
Conclusion
The 90/10 kissing rule is a valuable tool for navigating the complexities of romantic interactions. By prioritizing consent and mutual interest, it ensures both parties feel comfortable and respected. Whether you’re on a first date or exploring a new relationship, this rule can help create memorable and meaningful moments. Remember, the key to any romantic gesture is communication and respect. Always be attentive to your partner’s cues and feelings, and enjoy the journey of discovering each other’s boundaries and interests.
